The Cult

If you received our flyers and were interested in joining the Cult, please direct yourself to the chant section of the flyer and practise.

Wear our clothes, spread the word.
Leaderlovesyou

 

The enemy will electro shock you, kill you or drag you into hell! 
This is a matter of burning urgency!

All of this can be avoided by joining us and buying our Leader certified
Cult shirts.

Become one with your Cult Family and the Universe.

Become a t r u e b e l i e v e r today

WE CAN TEACH YOU SPECIAL POWERS!
PERSONAL POWER!
PSYCHIC POWER!
PAST LIFE CONNECTIONS!

 Don’t you want a world of unconditional love and a family that loves you? Our Ideology answers all questions! You can join us and be special!

WE HAVE A MISSION TO SAVE YOU!
For only a small one off fee every month, you too can join the love and support of the Leader.
ONLY $5000!!!!
Can you really put a price on enlightenment? WE CAN!

 NOTHING IN THIS WORLD HAS VALUE UNLESS IT RELATES TO THE LEADER OR THE PURPOSE
WEAR OUR CLOTHES!
EAT OUT FOOD!
RECEIVE ENLIGHTENMENT!

(pay our fee)

 

Chants to practice!

I LOVE THE LEADER,

THE LEADER IS LOVE,

WHEN I’M NOT WITH HIM

I FEEL LIKE A SHLUB

I LOVE THE LEADER,

THE LEADER IS LOVE,

WHEN I’M NOT WITH HIM

I FEEL LIKE A SHLUB

The songs are catchy!

THE LEADER IS GOOD

THE LEADER IS GREAT

WE SURRENDER OUR WILL

AS OF THIS DATE

THE LEADER IS GOOD

THE LEADER IS GREAT

WE SURRENDER OUR WILL

AS OF THIS DATE”

Frequently asked questions

Who is the leader?
The leader is everywhere and nowhere, he is in our hearts, but he lives in Frankston
Can I claim the fee on my tax return?
All enlightenment is final, have a chat to our Cult accountant for tax breaks.
I have grey teeth what can I do?
Join the Cult we will clear them up for you!
The deceased members of my family are no longer seeing me, they are very rude, what can I do?
We will give you a seminar given by our dear Leader on the importance of cutting out dead weight in your lives.
Will the leader increase my phone reception?
The higher power provided by the Leader does provide better phone reception.
Why do you guys keep doing this?
The Leader and his Cult enlighten all that need it or not. Also the phone reception provided by enlightenment is a nice bonus.

Success stories

Lowrants:

Ever since I received the touch of the leader I have increased my levels of enlightenment through the roof. I received hair where it wasn’t before, in my trouble areas. Praise the Leader!

Maydey:

All I ever wanted was to have wet sneezes, I tried praying but it didn’t work, until I found the Leader. Since that fateful day, my sneezes have been nice and wet. Praise the Leader!

(Name Disclosed):

I am a prominent member of the Cult and also heavily involved in the Bird Law Court of Australia. I am quite well learned in all areas of Bird Law. The Leader has allowed me to get to this dream position with many influences; I am completely at the expense of the Leader. The leader is good, the leader is great, I surrender my will, as of this day!